A humorous time-travel tale about ancient India, modern technology, and one very demanding strategist!
“History is written by the victors,” they say. Clearly, they never met the assistant.
One ordinary afternoon, I was happily sipping masala chai, arguing with my laptop about WordPress plugins, when my smartwatch beeped.
“Congratulations! You have won an exclusive Time Travel Experience.”
I thought it was another scam. Before I could click Delete, my room began spinning like my washing machine during the spin cycle.
The next thing I knew… I was standing in Pataliputra.
No Wi-Fi.
No Google Maps.
No food delivery app.
Just elephants, soldiers, scholars… and one very intense-looking man staring at me.
“You’re late,” he said.
“I’m… sorry?”
“I am Chanakya. You are my new assistant.”
Excuse me?
Day 1: There Is No Job Description
In my office life, I had survived demanding bosses.
But Chanakya?
He didn’t believe in meetings. He believed in missions.
“Arrange a meeting with Chandragupta.”
“When?”
“Yesterday.” 🥴😵💫🤔😕❓
I hadn’t even figured out how to wear the local clothes.
My First Suggestion
Trying to be helpful, I smiled.
“Sir, why don’t we create a WhatsApp group?”
He looked puzzled.
“What’s WhatsApp?”
I proudly explained.
“It is a magical system where people ignore messages instantly.”
Chanakya’s eyes sparkled.
“So… exactly like kings.”
Modern Problems Meet Ancient Solutions
I decided to improve efficiency.
I drew a to-do list.
Chanakya quietly replaced it with one sentence:
“Do the important work before someone else does.”
Well…
That saved at least three productivity books.
The Royal Calendar Disaster
Coming from the digital age, I suggested using Google Calendar.
“Reminders help.”
Chanakya smiled.
“We have something better.”
“What?”
“Consequences.”
Honestly…
That system had an excellent success rate.
Nobody forgot anything twice.
Social Media According to Chanakya
I secretly imagined opening his Instagram account.
@RealChanakya
Bio:
“Destroying corruption since 350 BCE.”
Latest Reel:
“Five signs your minister is plotting against you.”
Comments:
🔥🔥🔥
“Sir, please reveal Part 2.”
“Can you review my kingdom?”
“First!”
The Secret Intelligence Department
One morning I found people entering silently, whispering messages, then disappearing.
“Oh! Your intelligence network.”
Chanakya nodded.
I proudly announced,
“We have something even faster.”
“What?”
“Twitter.”
He frowned.
“Does it verify information?”
I laughed. He didn’t.
Lunch Break
I finally sat down to eat. Simple food. No fancy presentation. No fifteen ingredients listed on a menu. Just wholesome food prepared with care.
Strangely…
It tasted better than many expensive meals I’d eaten in the future. Perhaps hunger really is the best seasoning. Or perhaps ancient cooks never photographed food for ten minutes before serving it.
The One Thing I Would Secretly Change
History tells us Chanakya was brilliant. But brilliance often walks hand in hand with relentless work. One evening I quietly placed a handwritten note on his desk.
It read:
“Even the sharpest mind needs rest.”
He never mentioned it. The next afternoon… He took a brief walk in the royal gardens. Maybe coincidence. Maybe not.
I’ll happily take partial credit.
Before Returning Home
As the mysterious portal reopened, Chanakya handed me a small palm-leaf manuscript.
Inside was just one line.
“Technology changes. Human nature does not.”
Back in my apartment, my phone buzzed with thirty-seven notifications. For the first time… I ignored them. Instead, I made myself another cup of tea. Some lessons don’t need Wi-Fi.
Why This Journey Changed Me
Time travel isn’t really about changing history. It’s about discovering that every era has the same struggles:
- Too much work.
- Too many distractions.
- Too many people giving unsolicited advice.
- Too little wisdom.
Perhaps that’s why Chanakya still feels surprisingly modern. He didn’t have artificial intelligence. He understood natural intelligence. And maybe… that’s the software we’ve forgotten to update.
Over to You
If you could travel back in history and become the assistant of any historical figure, who would you choose?
Leonardo da Vinci?
Rani Lakshmibai?
Albert Einstein?
APJ Abdul Kalam?
Or would you politely decline after hearing the words…
“You’re late.”
I’d love to hear your answer in the comments!
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Neerja Bhatnagar
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